Life Is Messy

Sometimes people don't want to talk about it.

Maybe if we pretend it isn't there, no one will know about it.

What? That you're life isn't perfect? That you don't have it all figured out? That you don't have all the answers? That you're actually...........human!? *GASP!*

So what? Life is messy. Life can get ugly sometimes. Life hurts. That's just the way it is. And I know we've all heard it a bazillion times, but, life isn't fair. It's not. It won't ever be fair. (Until Jesus comes back. ;))

So why do we act like it's not okay to not be okay? Why do we hide behind our fake smiles and lie when people ask us how we're doing? What is so terrible about being honest?

 The thing is, nobody is ever okay 100% of the time. Maybe not even 75% or 50% of the time. Life is crazy and messy and unpredictable and we've got no choice but to try to somehow get through those difficult times. We're not always going to know where we're going. We're not always going to be happy. Times will be bad. They'll suck ass. Everyone goes through crap at one point or another. So why try to hide it all the time?

It's okay to not be okay.

If I ask how you're doing, it's because I want to know. Because I actually care. It's not some pleasantry, or just, you know, shooting the breeze. Just small talk. (I hate small talk.) I ask because you're important to me and I hope you feel comfortable enough to share parts of your life with me. If you're having a crappy day and feel like shit, I want to know. I want to be there to offer a listening ear. I want you to know that someone understands. And even if it's something that, maybe I can't understand personally, I still want to be there to the best of my ability. Offer support. Or the least I could do is buy you coffee. Or, I don't know, some chicken.

I think christians especially have this mindset or whatever that it's not "normal" or "acceptable" to be without answers. For some reason we think we're supposed to be the ones with all the answers. We're supposed to be the ones out there saving souls, so we should never feel lost ourselves. We should never be not okay. We should never be depressed. We should never be unjoyful. We should never have doubts. How will anyone ever see Jesus in us if we're depressed? How will the world see God's love in us if we're unhappy for a millisecond? Aren't we supposed to have our acts together? Aren't we supposed to possess superhuman powers that prevent anything bad from happening to us? We're not supposed to be capable of experiencing things like despair, pain, loss, discouragement, anguish, sorrow, misery, dejection. We're supposed to always think positive thoughts and always have something encouraging to say.

Right?

WRONG!

Wrong wrong wrong. Wrong. Because you see, bad things do happen to good people. I don't know why. I'll never know why. I don't think anyone knows why. But that's part of life. I wish it wasn't. I really wish it wasn't. And sometimes there just isn't anything encouraging to say. Sometimes it seems like there aren't any positive things to think about. And sometimes we are broken.

And that is okay too.