Memories. Aren't they a strange thing? It's strange to think about. Something could happen and we could wake up one day with no memories at all. No connection to the past. To the people we knew. We could forget it all.
I don't want to forget.
When it rains, I want to remember that day. When I pass by a bowling alley, I want to remember that day. On Sundays, I want to remember all the Sundays I spent with Matt and Anne, having lunch together.
A couple weeks after the night at the bowling alley, Matt started coming to church. The first time he came, I was surprised at seeing him. His hair was pulled back neatly, no lose strands trying to fly away. He wore a pair of khaki pants and a white button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up a bit. Anne saw him first; she was facing the door. Waving him over, she smiled and welcomed him. I smiled, too.
After the service was over Anne suggested that the three of us go out for lunch. I shot her a look. Was she trying to force me together with Matt? But I brushed it off and agreed anyway.
Sunday lunches with Matt and Anne became normal for me. After a while it became something I looked forward to. Spending so much time with other people, it was...unusual for me. For so long I had been a loner, someone who's used to doing things on her own. In the beginning it wasn't by choice; I just didn't have any friends. I wasn't sure how to go about making any. Then I'd gotten used to being by myself. It was hard to break that mold. But after some time of being around other human beings, I realized how much I'd missed it.
"Let's go shopping!" Matt says at lunch one Sunday. It's late August, almost September. We sit at a table in a small bistro. Anne is to my left, Matt to my right.
"Shopping?" I ask, skeptical. "Why do we need to go shopping?"
"Don't discourage the boy!" Anne, who adores shopping, says.
"Because we're going to the beach, and I need some new clothes, that's why," Matt answers, grinning mischievously. I am very confused. "Since when are we going to the beach?" I ask. This is the first I've heard about it.
"Well, since I'm going to be going off to school soon, I think we should go to the beach before summer is officially over. I've been secretly planning it for a while." His eyes gleam like a little kid. I look at Anne to see if she knew about this. I can't tell, she just looks ecstatic. "I don't know..." I begin, but I don't get very far.
"Come on! It'll be a blast! And it's only for a few days," Matt says. He tilts his head to the side and pretends to pout.
"Bailey, this is the beach we're talking about here!" Anne pipes in. "And besides, Rock is coming too. That's the only reason my parents are letting me go." Ah, so she did know. Rock is her older brother, and I still don't know why they call him that. Anne and Matt are the same age, both a year and a half younger than me. I wouldn't need my parents' permission to go, but I'm still not sure. Granted, the beach is only about an hour away, and I haven't been in a very long time. As I consider it, a little voice in the back of my mind whispers, "Do it! Go! Live a little. Be spontaneous for a change!" Matt still looks at me hopefully. I crack.
"Alright! Fine. I'll go."
"Anne, what do you think about this one?" Matt is holding up a horrible looking mustard-yellow short-sleeve button up shirt for Anne to inspect. It has a weird maroon triangle pattern all over it. We decided on shopping after all.
She makes a face like she's in pain. By the looks of that shirt, it's quite possible she is.
"Ugh, Matt! That's gross." She shakes her head and says, "Get Bailey to help you while I go look for flip-flops." And with that, she's gone.
"Is it really that bad?" he asks me, obviously oblivious to his lack of fashion sense.
"Um, yeah, it really is that bad." I can't help but laugh at him. "Maybe tone it down just a little. Or, well, maybe a lot. Try something like this," I say, grabbing a light blue shirt in the same style; short-sleeve button up, but without the loud colors and awkward triangle pattern. "And if you're willing to try it," I say, "maybe go with something a bit classier than cut-offs and tie-dye." I smile at him. He laughs and smiles back. "I think it's worth a shot," he says, scanning through a rack of clothes. I help him pick out a few shirts that I think will look good on him. "Stripes are usually a win, as long as they're neutral colors, and plaid works most of the time, as long as it isn't like, yellow and pink or something," I tell him, laughing a little, because I could definitely see him wearing something like that.
"Right, got it. Pink and yellow plaid - not good."
After we've looked around and picked out a few more things, I say, "Okay, I guess you can go try all those on now."
I wait outside the dressing room. It's not long before he comes out, modeling the first outfit. The shirt is the light blue button up I picked out. He's also got on a pair of grey shorts, much nicer-looking than cut-offs.
"So? What do you think?" he says, spinning around and striking a model-type pose. I laugh. "I think it looks really good. I like the combination. Let's see the other ones." He dances off, back to the dressing room. A couple more minutes and he's back out wearing the second outfit. This time he's got on a grey and green striped pocket shirt and a pair of navy shorts that are rolled up a couple times.
"How do I look?" he asks. I smile slightly. He sounds a little unsure.
"Don't worry, you look great. I like the stripes. How many more have you got left?"
"Just one," he says, heading back to the dressing room. The next time he emerges he's wearing a maroon short-sleeve shirt that has a few buttons at the throat and a pocket on the left. The sleeves are rolled up a bit. That's when I notice his arms. They are definitely larger than when I first met him. His muscles stand out, making him look sort of buff. I shake my head, realizing that I've been staring.
"Well? How do you like this one?" he asks.
"Um. Oh, I like it a lot. Maroon is a good color on you, and it goes well with the tan pants." The pants are rolled up a few inches on the bottom, apparently the style this year.
Once Matt is back into the clothes he came in, we head off to the shoes department. Anne is still there.
"What have you been doing this whole time?" I ask her.
"Trying on shoes, duh," she says, like it should be obvious.
"I thought you were just looking for flip-flops," Matt says, laughing.
"I was, and I found some. But then I saw a pair of flats that I had to try on. They're the cutest things! But I couldn't find my size so I went to ask the salesperson if they had any more, and he was taking a really long time, but finally he came back out with the shoes. So I tried them on and loved them! I decided to get those, too. And then after that I saw these cute running shoes, so now I'm trying them on." I just blink.
"Anne, you don't run," I tell her, as if that will make any difference.
"Well, I might, if I had some super cute shoes to run in," she says, smiling. Far be it from me to get between the woman and her shoes.
"Right, well, you do that while Bailey and I go look over here," Matt says, taking my arm and leading me off to the Men's section. I think Anne's shoe obsession scares him. I know how he feels.
Matt already has flip-flops, so I suggest boat shoes. He actually really likes them, which surprises me. I thought he would insist on Chucks, or something like that. We've narrowed it down to either navy blue or a reddish color called Red Nubuck.
"Which do you like best?" I ask Matt. He seems to ponder this for a moment, then says, "I think the red. What do you think?"
"Yeah, I think so too."
I decide to get a couple pairs of shorts while we're here. It doesn't take me long to choose some brown plaid, some blue striped shorts, and a pair of light green crop pants that Anne talked me into getting. But no matter how hard she pushed, I would not hear of purchasing the bikini she wanted me to get to match hers. Finally we're finished and ready to go. Once we're back in Matt's jeep, I ask, "So when are we going to the beach exactly?" I can't believe I'm just now asking.
"Next weekend," Matt answers. "We'll leave Friday morning and come back Sunday afternoon." I feel something slowly swelling up inside of me. It's small at first, but it grows steadily larger. It's excitement.
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